How pathetic am I? This is the 1st weekend in 4 weekends that we will all be together for the weekend and I am so excited I can hardly stand it! I hope Frank and I get a chance to rent/watch some movies. Also, there are tons of family friendly movies at the dollar theatre. I am so excited for us to spend time all together which is nice b/c I still haven't lost the 8 pounds I gained while on Prednisone and its completely bumming me. I've been more conservative with my food choices lately and been moving a lot ,but still the weight has hung on. Dieting is a tricky venture for me (I'm not being attention seeking it took me years to admit this), but I am in recovery from 2 eating disorders so I think I am fat all the time, but when the pants get tight and the scale shows a gain I know it's bad news. Trying to diet without going crazy can be very difficult for me. The Dr would like me to stay at my "new" weight and I will be fine with that if I can turn some of this back into muscle. When we could afford for me to go to the gym I know I worked a greater variety of muscles than I am working now. I have free weights that I lift and legs I attach to my ankles while I perform leg work, but still. There is a small part of me that says, "Ya know I'm 35, I have 2 children and work full time maybe I should let up a little, I'm still the same size I was in high school (okay for most of high school b/c I was also a size 3 on and off throughout high school -diet pop and aerobics, but it's been a frightful long time since I've been able to wear a size 3)but I'm so scared to do that b/c last time I did that I gained 30 pounds in less than a year.
So I very very scared. Please bare with me. Hopefully I can loose just 4 of this and I will be better!
Smiles,
Jennifer